


Excavator X

by OnceUponAReset



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Action, Action/Adventure, Adventure, Attempt at Humor, Bad Puns, F/M, Fluff, Humor, No Smut, Puns & Word Play, Skeleton Fluff, Skeleton Puns, Tickling, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, cinnamonroll papyrus, maybe next time though ;), papyrus everything, papyrus fluff, sorry lol, too fluffy for our own good
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-12
Updated: 2017-05-12
Packaged: 2018-10-30 22:01:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10885788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnceUponAReset/pseuds/OnceUponAReset
Summary: It's all the rage these days to go out and play those live real-world map based games that are always advertised in the internet.This game is refined, adventurous, and all about leveling up and ranking to the best of your ability. Your status is everything to one another these days. Can't go past a monster or human without being asked, "Hey, what's your rank?"Somewhere along the way, aiming to the next location to find treasure and level yourself up to a higher status, a tall skeleton with a heart of gold boldly insists to escort you into the night to finish your quest safely.But in the end, did you actually find your treasure following your journey? Or was it standing at your side all along, boasting a crop top and gloves?





	Excavator X

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Metamaterialgirl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Metamaterialgirl/gifts).



> This one-shot is a gift for @Metamaterialgirl! More so than just drawing so much art for my main story, Bone Appetit, she's also a very sweet person and talking to her always makes me want to better myself as a person. I owe her so much for her continued support, so I made this to show my appreciation!
> 
> I hope it's enjoyable...! MWEH...!! *hides in a bush*
> 
> I squish her so much guys, you don't even KNOW LJEOQWID UR(@U_(@ !#I_)XX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You push through the last stretch of chicken wire before you let out a sigh when you reach the top, propped up uncomfortably over either side of the fenced off area as you pause to take a breather. Your face is flushed and droplets of sweat coat the sides of your face and your neck heavily.  

You've been out there for five hours, and the sun is still up with about an hour of life. Your muscles twitch with both anticipation and exhaustion.

You can see a few people walking around with their phones at hand a couple distances back, monsters and humans alike having jumped in the game and paired up in diverse groups here and there with their phones up on the newest app craze currently going on.

Yeah... It's got to do with that new app you've been waiting for since it's announcement half a year ago, but even _you_ hadn't expected the game to blow up as much as it did.

It's not even produced by anyone relatively known. It was made by an anonymous user, but everyone and their mother knows what it's called.

_Excavator X._

The name, strange as it was even when first announced, is now being talked about by even the most famous of celebrities.

Rappers, talk show hosts, singers... Actors like even the widely known Mettaton, and even politicians.

If you don't know the app, you are out of a _serious_ loop, that's for damn sure. At least that's how _you_ see it.

Admittedly, it's really a stupid game and you hardly understand why you're so addicted to it. Consequently, the main goal of the game is to use the real life navigation system to reach "hidden" locations and collect crystals and coordinates to other nearby gems and crystals. The more gems and crystals you rack up... The higher your level and status.

If you and another person are nearby and find the treasure close to the same time, you're prompted to fight in a heated tap-attack game, which is where the level plays the greatest part. Lower levels lose tap-attacks pretty easily if pit up against a higher level such as yourself.

Lower leveled people are of no matter to _you_ however.

You're literally only a few points away to becoming a Marchioness, level four out of six levels until you hit the highest ranks with the best of the best, Grand Duchess.

Once you're a Grand Duchess, you'll unlock even _more_ types of treasures. In fact, the game even promises REAL world treats, like money and gift cards, which you're still not too inclined to believe _just_ yet.

Honestly, who really cares whether there's a real pay off? Being a Grand Duchess, or in a male player's case, a Grand Duke, is cool enough to have bragging rights.

Such a stupid game...

...A stupid game you've been playing excessively the past week, enough that in the midst of your obsession, monsters have subsequently gained official rights and are now protected by law. In fact, you've been so absorbed that you have 41 messages from your friends and family that you haven't responded, not because you don't _want_ to, but because you keep swiping the notifications off the screen and promising, "later."

Needless to say... "Later" is taking a very long time.

You look up at the orange streaked sky and take a deep breath, preparing yourself for a twenty minute hike ahead of you to get to this new location that has suddenly popped up in your game promptly after getting the last treasure near the city museum. It's a strange prompt from the game that you've never gotten before, saying that you need to walk close to the middle of nowhere to get to the next treasure.

A quick second scan of other players away from the fenced off field you're in makes you mildly queasy. No one is heading in the same direction as you... Usually the game is programmed to give the next location of a spawned treasure to at least two people or more... The fact that it seems like you're the only one going is a little strange.

...Not that it's about to stop you or anything, cause _YOU NEED THIS TREASURE._  According to your app, it's _really_ valuable, and maybe the fact that you're the only one getting this location is a golden opportunity for you! It's _just_ enough to push you to becoming a Marchioness today, so you can retire for the night and continue tomorrow as a whole new rank!

_Perfect~!_ You cackle a bit darkly to yourself, completely oblivious to the world around you, as well as the sound of crunching tall dry grass as someone approaches you from behind almost cautiously.

"...Greetings, human! How is the weather up there?" A jubilant voice suddenly snaps you out of your musings, making you look to the right to find an astonishingly tall skeleton standing by the gate you're currently sitting on. In fact... Holy crap, he's a head taller than the flipping fence itself!

"Um... Hello, skeleton! You tell me, you're practically at my level," you answer with a stiff smile playing at your lips.

You honestly don't have an qualms with monsters whatsoever. In fact, you've visited a few monster-owned shops with no problem and you honestly don't care that they're so diverse and... _Admittedly_ creepy every now and then, but you're okay with that. And even if you weren't, well, not like you've got any say in that, do you?

...That being said, your mild distaste with his presence has nothing to do with him being a skeleton.

This has to do with the smartphone in his blue gloved hand, with the screen conveniently opened to the familiar travel page of _Excavator-freaking-X._

He was given the same coordinates as you, wasn't he? You've _jinxed_ yourself, you _idiot!_

Seems like the tall skeleton has made the same assessment by glancing at your phone, but rather than groan or get fired up like most people do when they find others heading for the same location, he grins even brighter at the sight. 

"Oh! Human! We appear to be going to relatively similar locations! Although..." He leans in closer and lifts your phone a bit to angle it to his favor, leering thoughtfully at all the information. "...Yours is prompting you to go oddly far into the woodland area. Hmm..."

He pulls back and touches his chin in thought as he looks up at you and gives you a quick assessment.

Confused, you blink quietly and wait for his verdict on whatever he appears to be studying you for.

"...Human! I, The Greatest of the Greatest, Grand Duke _Papyrus,_ will escort you to your location and assist you in rising your rank to Marchioness! _Nyeh heh heh!"_ The skeleton suddenly announces, much to your immense shock for two reasons.

"You're a _Grand Duke?!"_ You ask in both clear excitement and shock, watching as the Skeleton strikes a rather heroic pose and nods with that strangely adorable laugh of his. Second thing that strikes you as surprising, "B-but... Why would you waste your time helping a lower ranked Countess like _me?"_

A quick peek at his phone and you realize that he's indeed right about his coordinates not being as far as your own. His coordinates are closer to the city, heading in the same direction as _your_ coordinates... To an extent, that is. If he reaches _his_ location and collects treasure, it's only one-fourth of the distance from where the two of you are currently standing, to the location of your coordinates. This "Papyrus" (is that really his name?) would _really_ be going out of his way if he escorts you to your treasure...

The Grand Duke of a skeleton gives you a strange look, but then smiles and starts to climb over the fence stealthily, prompting you to hold on so you aren't shaken off. 

He's wearing what looks to be some loose gray jogging pants with the little drawstrings at the front tied in a perfect bow. His top is a royal blue cropped tank top that has this really cool designed logo he clearly made by himself reading _"Rad Skele-Duke"_ in gray fabric paint. Around each wrist are black sweat bands- with a matching striped black band around the hemisphere of his skull, just above his brow.

"Nonsense! Every ranking player matters, dear human, please do not downplay your importance in this epic journey to greatness! ...Well, greatness second to _me_ , of course," the tall skeleton cackles, waggling his brow bones at you as he sits atop the gate in front of you with little to no problem balancing. Sitting down, he's still incredibly tall- and honestly... Maybe you're a little attracted to that. You've never actually been attracted to a monster before either, so it's strange... But strange in a good way, if you must elaborate.

You smile and giggle in response. "Alright! Fine, you've convinced me..." Already invigorated by his charismatic presence, you yourself can't help but start to really get into the prospect of this hike to the coordinates. Even more so than when you first started! "Handsome Grand Duke Skeleton! I hereby accept your excessively generous offer to escort me to the literal middle of nowhere! 

The skeleton appears to gloat and puff up his chest at your compliment. You yourself can't help but giggle as he proceeds to jump off his side and gesture for you to jump as well. He has his arms held out to catch you, much to your inner delight.

With a lithe twist, you position yourself properly and drop right into his blue gloved hands. For a skeleton, he's awfully comfortable and warm...

_Stop, stop, stop! You barely know him, talk before you start growing any attachments!_  You scold yourself.

...Really though, it's _so_ hard when he's literally the walking embodiment of a knight, prince, comedian, confidant, and puppy all rolled into one tall fruit snack of a skeleton!

While walking a few ways, with no sign of another player heading to the same coordinates as you are with the skeleton monster, (both you and him must be so lucky to not have a rival for the treasures you are each heading for), the two of you chat together to pass time.

You guess, offhandedly, that maybe the excavators with the same coordinates as the two of you had decided to retire since the sun is going down. Sometimes that happens, although with the popularity of the game, it's pretty rare. Even _you_ have stayed out late to play the game into the late hours, but now you're becoming a bit more wary due to the incidents in the news showing up regarding the nature of this game and the way nefarious people are using it to their shady advantage.

With this tall skeleton by your side though, your worries immediately melt away.

How could they not? He's a cinnamon roll!

Oh, and Also... His name is, in fact, _really_ Papyrus. According to him, he's even got a brother named _Sans_ , and as soon as you start bringing up a few jokes about fonts and their names, Papyrus rolls his sockets and tells you you'd _unfortunately_ get along a lot better with his brother.

At that, you say, "Yeah, but... If I were _**sans** _ Papyrus, that would make me _**sans**_ a smile! After all, I'm already _**font**_ of you! You're more my _**type**_ , you know?"

That little joke causes the tall skeleton to not only roll around with laughter at first, but even scold you when he warns you of the overuse of a pun like his brother tends to do. Apparently, using the same pun over and over again makes Papyrus lose his mind...

And the sight is freaking amazing.

"Hey, hey, Pap!"

"Yes, human?"

"Careful with that root in _**font**_ of ya, I wouldn't wanna be _**sans**_ a Grand Duke!" 

Papyrus stops walking immediately and turns to face you with a shocked look of absolute betrayal, right before looking up into the sky and releasing a scream of epic proportions that makes you fall over in the wheat-like tall grass in a fit of laughter.

While you're rolling around and laughing hard enough to produce tears, you hear him eventually cut off his scream to start scolding you. 

"Human! Do you have absolutely _no_ respect for your own vocal chords to be repeating the same puns over and over again!" Papyrus howls, though the smile playing at his cheekbones makes you sit up and push tall grass aside to meet his gaze. He's standing right above you, leaning half down by his waist with his hands on his hips and his oh-so-serious glare trained on you. You boldly smile up and meet his glare without an ounce of regret.

"Mmm, _nope~!"_ You chirp energetically, adoring the amount of attention you're receiving. Hopefully he doesn't notice and become weirded out, cause that's happened a few times before. When you get flirty, sometimes boys run from your boldness.

...It appears that Papyrus is not one of those types of boys.

The tall skeleton seems to notice your upbeat and energetic attitude, and leers down at you with a suspicious grin playing across his face.

"Human... Are you perhaps doing this for the mere reason of getting a rise out of me?" Papyrus observes keenly, much to your amusement.

_Took him long enough!_

You laugh again, but say nothing in response, making the tall skeleton suddenly tuck his phone in his pocket and lift his hands with a dark cackle. You know _exactly_  what he means when he twiddles the phalanges under his blue gloves, making you quiver slightly in horror. 

He _wouldn't...!_

"Human, I have many ways to get an answer. In fact, I am an _expert_ in the knowledge of the weakest spots of a human!" 

As if to make a point, Papyrus' hand snaps out with lightning precision. Upon poking a sensitive area of your waist, you release a sharp squeak and recoil from his touch. With slowly creeping horror, you come to the realization that he speaks the truth, prompting you to scramble backwards in a crab walk as the tall skeleton gets down on his knees and crawls towards you with gleefully mischievous intent, right before placing his gloved hands at your stomach and waist to begin his "attack".

"NO-! _Snnnrrk! P-Pap!_  STOP~!" You're half giggling and squealing with immense regret for "angering" the Grand Duke. "I'M SORRY! _Eeeek~! P-please! **MERCY!"**_

Papyrus finally stops, but his hands still hover over you as he laughs that trademark "Nyeh heh heh...!" of his.

Within a few moments of catching your breath and allowing the adrenaline rush of excitement to leave your body, you realize that the tall skeleton is completely hovering directly on top of you.

He's not touching a shred of your body, yet his knees are on either side of your legs. Their length hardly graze your curled up limbs, and from the way he is seated with the setting sun behind him, you can see a contrast of sharp light lining his skeletal skull and the visible bones around his shoulders and arms.

You've never been attracted to a monster before.

But lord have mercy, _you're sure as **hell** attracted to this one right now._

At the notice of this, your cheeks tint slightly red, but Papyrus seems otherwise oblivious of this, placing his hovering hands on his hips proudly.

"And thus, another human captured by the _Great Papyrus!"_  He announces to the rest of the world, which had faded away from your consciousness in the time you were admiring him, and _only_ him, under the sunlight. Before you can say anything, he scoops you up and jumps to his feet, running off with a shout of _"Nyeh~!"_  as he proceeds to race the rest of the way towards your coordinates for your treasure.

By the time you near the location (on your feet again), the light of the sun is already gone, and looking back Eastward displays the sky tinting to a vibrant shade of indigo, slowly growing darker and darker like a gradient as night starts to take over the sky. 

"Human, excuse me while I phone my brother to let him know my whereabouts. I'm sure he would be immensely worried if I wasn't back by the hour I usually am," Papyrus states, pulling his phone out and dialing a number. 

It isn't until then, when you see his phone produced from his pocket, that you realize he'd never stopped the two of you before to get _his_ treasure! You guys literally walked right past it! Had you distracted him and made him forget? Oh no, what if he gets mad at you?!

Either way, you're already blurting out an apology.

"Oh no! We forgot your treasure, Papyrus!" You state, watching as he glances back at you with his phone already pressed against the side of his skull. He looks like he's about to say something, but that's when someone suddenly speaks up in a deep static rumble from his phone. 

You're surprised his brother has such a deep voice, but decidedly brush it off since you're more worried about whether Papyrus is mad at you or not. He was quiet for a few moments before announcing he'd be calling his brother... Was that because he realized that he missed his treasure before _you'd_ realized it?

"Yes, Sans? It is I! P-...? What do you mean _'"I"_ _who'?_ Who else would be calling you at this hour, lazy bones?! Now... Please excuse me for a second."

Papyrus pulls the phone away from his skull and covers the speaker with his gloved hand, offering you a warm grin that washes away any and all nerves.

"Human, do not fret. I chose to leave it behind, it is rather late and I'd much rather help you return home safely! After all, there is much treasures that will spawn aplenty tomorrow," The tall skeleton, with more of a heart than you're sure literally exists within his skeletal rib cage, assures you gently, reaching over to pat your head and uncover the speaker of his phone.

_He left his own treasure so you'd return home as early as possible,_ you think, feeling your cheeks dust red in response as you avert your gaze downwards. That's so nice and considerate! Not many people would brush off their own schedules to further yours, and although out of the ordinary, you're filled with immense flattery.  

"Hello, Sans? Would you like to meet my new human friend? I think you'll find her to be rather... _Punny._ Nyeh heh heh!"

You shoot Papyrus a mischievous grin as he passes the phone to you, clearing your voice into something a little more serious.

"So... You must be Sans," you speak up with a monotonous drawl, just as Papyrus brother seems to chuckle a little on the line. He doesn't sound like he enjoys your tone, which is a good sign on your part since you want to drop a bomb on him. Papyrus has told you that Sans is wary of humans, but you know _exactly_ how to deal with characters such as himself.

_"Yep. I'm Sans the Skeleton,"_ He replies stiffly.

You see the opportunity and swan dive for it.

"'Sans the skeleton'?! _What?!_ Your brother's a skeleton- if you don't have a skeleton, are you _a ghost?"_ You blurt out, watching as Papyrus slaps a hand over his mouth to stop himself from letting out a laugh.

You're met with silence on the phone.

...

...

...?

_"... **Snnnr-k!** Wow, um... Never thought someone would completely get me on my staple introduction. I guess you're an okay gal. You ain't **sans** the skeleton, right? You're human?" _He finally responds, allowing you to release a giggle of delight that makes Sans laugh in response. _"What?"_

You take a moment to straighten yourself out. "Yes, I'm a human. I've got a skeleton though, that much I am sure of!" You state before spotting the odd way Papyrus is staring at you from the corner of your eye. At the notice of this strange, suspicious gaze, you feel a layer of sweat breaking across your forehead. Maybe you're being a bit too, uh, _s_ _ansy_ and informal with his brother? It does seem like you have more in common with the so called, "Lazy bones", but that doesn't mean you'd like him more- considering you met Papyrus first... Surely the tall skeleton isn't worried about that, is he?

You turn to look Papyrus dead in the eye, surprising a tint of orange out of him when you give him an obvious wink.

"Your brother is _really_ cool! I can't believe he's a Grand Duke, I'm so jealous! He's even helping me with pushing me over to a Marchioness status in Excavator X!" You watch as the tint of orange, growing in vibrancy across the tall skeleton's cheekbones, suddenly hits it's peak of color saturation. "A 'Rad Skele-Duke' he is!"

Papyrus' looks elated by your praise as you skip over to his side to reach up and hug him warmly. The sound of something thrumming gently as you press your ear by his chest makes itself known, but you brush it off since _oh god,_ he is so _hot!_

...! W-well, you mean that _temperature_ wise, really! Although... You can't say he _isn't_ hot in that other way...

You bite your lip to resist a giddy giggle as he wraps his arms around you in return.

_"...Mm-hmm. Yep, that sounds like my cool brother, alright. Well, both of you stay safe out there, yeah? There's some sketchy stuff going on, but with my brother around, I'm sure someone like you is **sans** any danger. Tell him I say, **hasta la pasta.** "_

Papyrus groans out loud right on cue, and you nod, wondering what exactly Sans means when he stresses that last little farewell as if it were a pun. Maybe Papyrus likes spaghetti?

"Right! Maybe we can all hang out sometime and find treasure!" You chirp, pulling an inch back from Papyrus' chest. 

_"Huh? Oh! Yeah, sure. Maybe... Uh... Next year?"_  Much to your bewilderment and confusion, Sans suddenly hangs up on you after his awkward response, leaving you standing there in Papyrus arms with expressive wide eyes as you pull his phone back from your ear.

"What...?" You ask, looking up to see if you've done something wrong. Instead, Papyrus just sighs in annoyance and pats your head, side glancing at something that exists in his mind as a thought.

"Human, that was most certainly not you. To put it simply, Sans does not play Excavator X. It involves something he detests: _movement,"_  Papyrus supplies, making your mouth pop open in an 'O' of understanding. As you do this, he smiles down at you and finally releases you from the hug you initiated, leaving you somewhat sad as his body heat moves away from you. "Now, let us continue to your treasure!"

With an eager nod despite the cool air that tickles your skin through your unsuitable clothing for the night, the two of you turn towards the nearing edge of the woods, just where your treasure appears to be hiding, according to your smartphone.

The darkening sky has shaded the environment with tones of azure and cobalt, slowly growing darker and darker until Papyrus ends up using magic to summon a glowing blue bone, which gives us enough light to reach the coordinates and...

Your phone lets out a sharp **Ping!**  

"YOU HAVE REACHED THE EXCAVATOR POINT! MINE AND COLLECT CRYSTALS?" Your phone drones, making you squeak with excitement and tap away quickly at the screen to get your treasure, Papyrus eagerly cheering you on until- 

**Pi-Pi-PING!**

"YOU'VE COLLECTED **X2** Diamonds! **X3**  Quartz! **X1** Topaz! **X4** Amethyst!"

" ** _Level up~!_ Please standby.** _"_  

"It's happening...!" You squeal, practically jumping as you wait for the announcement of your phone.

" **...Please standby.** "

_Huh... Taking a bit of time, isn't it? Maybe it's because it spawned this coordinate so far towards the woods? I'll have to make a report of this so that no one else gets the prompt to go too far in lonely locations- I'm sure lucky to have Papyrus here with me,_ you think, only for you to frown when that message begins repeating.

" **...Please standby."**

" **...Please standby.** "

"Standby how long?" You ask with dwindling excitement, turning to look up at Papyrus to ask for his verdict and- 

_"HUMAN!"_

His sudden cry of alarm makes your nerves and muscles spasm into a petrified and frozen state. Huh?

Your body flinches downward when Papyrus pushes you to the ground, but you stay silent and snap your eyes shut as a reflex.

The sound of crunching dead leaves and a sharp male yelp of fear makes you curl up again, but eventually... All you hear is the panting breath of the skeleton standing in front of you. At least, that's what you guess, considering you can literally hear him breathing.

_How is he doing that without lungs...?_  You wonder in an attempt to distract yourself, but shake the thought away to bring your gaze up to see what has happened.

Papyrus is indeed standing in front of you. A couple of feet away by his feet, you see something akin to a mallet or hammer laying on the ground. It wasn't there before... You'd have seen it.

As you bring your gaze a little higher and look around Papyrus' legs, you're shocked to see a burly bearded young man surrounded by a glow of blue that tints the trees around him the same glowing color. He's been forced down onto his knees somehow, with a large bone protruding an foot or two out of the ground behind him. Was he tripped...? 

Confused by this strange man's presence but slowly connecting the dots to the hammer laying on the ground, you look up and see the sharp expression of alarm as it diminishes along Papyrus' features. His right eye socket is glowing a shade of orange within, but it isn't until he brings himself to walk over to the human and pull his sweatband from his forehead off that the orange tint begins to fade.

_Is this... Is this part of Papyrus' magic?!_  You slowly come to realize in surprise.

The man on the ground is glaring sharply at him, but it's clear he can't move whatsoever. As Papyrus rounds the man, the stranger makes eye contact with you, and you reflexively flinch at the poisonous snarl he throws your way.

"You were supposed to come _alone!_ Who the fuck is _this freak?!"_  He barks, but you only stare at him with a bewildered expression of shock.

You don't know this man. You've never even _seen_ him before, why is he talking to you like you know him or something?!

"This _freak..._ " Papyrus suddenly begins with a surprisingly acid tone as he ties the man's hands behind him using his sweatband, "Is the _Grand Duke Papyrus,_ escorting _my_ human to this exact location so that she may reach the next rank in Excavator X."

After he ties his wrists, Papyrus yanks the human up and spins him around, meeting his gaze with a return of his orange glowing right eye socket. The strange man is intimidated immediately, going pale and trying to cower from the seven foot tall skeleton. Papyrus doesn't look as gleeful as before, keeping his expression serious as he leans in towards the human's face.

"And you are _blue_ now."

The man grunts as his limbs suddenly reach towards the ground, allowing Papyrus to toss him over his shoulder like a rag doll. You're still in a state of shock, but as soon as Papyrus faces you, you're met with his familiar bright grin.

"Human, come along. The Great Papyrus will now escort you back to your abode safely!" He exclaims, holding a hand out down towards you warmly. 

So... You have no idea what's going on, you don't know why this guy seems to know you and know  _specifically_  that you'd _be_ at that location, and you're still getting over the assumption that this human was planning hit you with a hammer. You know... _Kill_ you.

But... Honestly, despite everything, you feel completely safe as soon as you meet your tall savior's grinning skeletal gaze.

You swallow thickly but take Papyrus hand with a weak smile, ignoring the **Ping!** your phone makes.

" **Congratulations~! You are now Ranked Marchioness, Excavator!** "

* * *

 

Papyrus ended up dropping the horrible human male off at the Police Station, every bit his old cheerful self before the human had made his attack. His entrance was certainly on point, as he shouted, "Greetings, Humans and Canine Unit of the Police Guard! The Great Papyrus has returned with a familiar suspect!"

Your eyes had nearly bugged out of your head when he said this.

_Papyrus is a flipping POLICE OFFICER?! ...Nah, he wouldn't hurt a fly...!_

Your mind had shifted back to how he'd easily intimidated the man that is now curled up on the floor, complaining about his hipbone. 

... _Maybe he doesn't have to hurt anyone...?_  You think uselessly, scratching your head at the conundrum.

According to the cops and Papyrus, this guy you and Paps met was actually someone they were actively seeking- a man that had apparently been hacking peoples computers to access their credit cards for his own use, and loitering around the females' sorority a few blocks into the city. 

And shockingly enough, you meeting Papyrus was no mere coincidence in itself either

_He approached you because this suspect was **stalking** you_.

And Papyrus? He was following you too- for the _opposite_ reasons. To make sure this other man didn't approach you. You find this odd though- considering a tall skeleton like him would certainly pop out among the crowds of humans and other monsters.

Papyrus knew this strange man hacked your phone to create a false coordinate point within the game. He knew you were going to go for that treasure, despite the time. He knew you wanted to rank up to Marchioness.

Somehow... That revelation kind of stung a bit, and Papyrus didn't seem blind to that. Honestly, you thought it was a miracle he approached you- someone as sweet and nice as him was just randomly announcing to escort you somewhere? Well... If you hadn't been so smitten with his charisma, you'd probably have noticed how odd that was. 

Which left you doing exactly what you're doing now, as you moodily march straight out of the police station after getting questioned, well into the night now, by his crazy monster friend, the Cheif of Police, Undyne.

"H-human, wait!" You unfortunately hear that tall skeleton shout behind as you distance yourself from the station, causing your to roll your eyes with a soft groan under your breath. Needless to say, you keep walking and even speed up your pace. You know it's no use, his legs are longer than yours, but you can dream, alright? After all, who _knows_ what else he wasn't telling you. Isn't that kind of _lying?_  

Maybe he wasn't telling the truth of anything else. Maybe you were crushing on an monster that doesn't exist.

You'd never crushed on a monster before- and after this, maybe you'll never want to ever again. 

Just as he catches your wrist, you twist out of his grip and frown up at him. You can't bring yourself to stare long, because emotion as thick as honey wells up in the cavity of your chest. You're _really_ attracted to him, and the look of hurt that flashes across his features only seems to double the pain you feel yourself.

You avert your gaze to the ground. 

You're being a brat... He saved your life after all. That in itself proves he really is a nice guy, but... It still hurts that he might have only played with your emotions to gain your trust. Enough that you'd lead him right to the perpetrator- like a piece of meat as _bait._

"You didn't talk to me because you wanted to be my friend. You were just doing your job... Don't get me wrong, I'm immensely grateful that you saved me and protected me. But you have the suspect now. You don't need to bother with me anymore. I'm okay with that. I'll get over it..." You say, staring at the ground solemnly. 

...

"IWASSUPPOSEDTOTALKTOYOUALONGTIMEAGOBUTYOUAREREALLYPRETTYANDICOULDNOTDOIT!"

The unorganized gibberish that flies out of Papyrus mouth finally makes you scrunch your face up in confusion to see what the fuss is about, but when you face him, his entire form is stiff as a waterboard. His arms are pinned to his sides and he's looking in all directions besides yours.

You've got no issues with your ears though, and some words have immediately jumped out at you from that jumbled mess of verbal grammar.

"Supposed", "Long time", "Pretty", and "Could not".

Of course, you zero in on pretty and can't help but look a little hopeful. "W-what?" you ask, watching the skeleton bring his eye sockets down to look at you after a moment.

"... I was supposed to talk to you four weeks ago. But I could not bring myself to do it," Papyrus admits once more, but this time you frown in confusion. No, you're _definitely_ sure you heard "pretty" somewhere in there before. Where did he put it?

"...Why?" You ask with narrowed eyes of suspicion, watching as pellets of glowing orange perspiration collects along the top of his skull.

"...Because you are very pretty," he practically squeaks at the lowest volume possible, his face glowing an embarrassing orange that only causes you to start giggling since the lack of light in the night pretty much only makes it worse. "H-human, please don't laugh! _Nyeh!"_

The tall skeleton rubs his face furiously to rid himself of the orange tint, an amusing sight for you before you reach out and grab his wrist for attention. When he looks back at you, you're biting your lip with an expression of wary uncertainty.

"Were... Were you being honest about everything else we talked about earlier on our way to the treasure coordinates?" You inquire, stepping just a little closer.

Papyrus looks shocked by your query, and quickly tugs you into a hug as soon as his blush fades. 

"Human, of _course!_  The Great Papyrus was one hundred percent myself at that time! I wanted to tell you the truth about that misguided human, however... I was worried you would become panicked when I told you I'd been following you around for a while."

...

Papyrus suddenly pulls back to look down at you with a funny expression of surprise. "Now that I think about it, I'm shocked you're far more upset with my deception than you are with the fact that I have been following you everywhere for the entirety of this past month. Surely you can't be completely fine with that!" 

You feel your cheeks heat up, but shake it off since...

A snicker escapes you.

No, you definitely believe him. The way he's behaving right now is exactly the same charisma you were crushing on during the hike to the excavation point... Yes, Papyrus really _is_ the same skeleton you were joking around with.

"I mean, yeah, I'm not all that thrilled you've been as much of a stalker as that other guy, but... Well, you didn't try to hit me with a hammer, did you? You're a cop that was around to make sure I was safe. I'm not mad because you did it to protect me. It's your job!"

Papyrus cracks a smile and pulls you into a hug. "...I _would_ enjoy going to excavate some more places with you, human. I had a lot of fun before that man ruined everything!" Papyrus says, much to your delight.

_And he really_ is _an Excavator X fan! EEeek!_

Oh, god, you're crushing again...

"By the way, would you like to join my brother and I for spaghetti tomorrow night?" He suddenly blurts out, making you grin against his shirt as you look up at him. He seems to blush when you smile, and you immediately feel the gears in your head working. He thinks you're pretty, you think he's attractive.

Maybe this is that start of something...  _ **skella rad.**_

_Eheheheheheh!_

"I guess you can say..." You start, watching as his eye sockets shadow with realization. He knows what you're about to do and a grin curls at your lips.

_"Human...!"_ He warns.

"That I'm..."

_"HUMAN...!"_   

"..."

**"..."**

"... _ **Spaghett-ing**_  excited."

_**"HUMAAAAAAAAN!!!"** _

**Author's Note:**

> *peeks from bush shyly*
> 
> ...Is it safe for the Reset to come out again? ('w')


End file.
